I'm just sick of a lot of things tonight. Sick of people, sick of being a liar and a loser and a suckup. Sick of second-guessing everyone's intentions and not knowing what's going on half the time.
Julia made us watch Requiem for a Dream today with her, since I got her it for Christmas (I really, really suck at keeping shit secret), and I'm just never watching that movie again. Once was enough for my lifetime. And I didn't even hear/see about a third of it.
Everyone's been asking me what's wrong today. I'm oversensitive and annoyed, that's what's wrong. I'm what's wrong.
I really don't think doing anything out of the ordinary would be a good idea tomorrow, and I know that I'm just going to be disappointing people but I'd rather let them down than have a hellish trip. I need to quit. I need a break to take care of myself. Although it never works when I say I'm going to do that.
I need to stop lying and figure out when and how and if I'm going back. I'm not going to graduate until I'm fucking thirty. I might as well swallow a bullet and take a job greeting at Wal-mart.
- Mood:
annoyed
Comments
Please cheer up! We organic materials to consume! How can I cheer you up? There must be a way. Get some sleep and relax. Take a bath.. read a good book when it's not super busy at the office. Chill and keep in mind that after this weekend we are taking a break. From everything. This lifestyle is too excessive and we need to calm down and try being sober friends for a while. Clear our minds, stop spending money on food and 'shop-ping' coverups. We just need a break.. but we need to have fun one more time! Before it gets hectic and there's more bell-ringing and family stuff/holiday shit to attend to.
It'll be brilliant, Dani. I LOVE YOU TO PIECES!
See ya tomorrow,
the enablerAmberROCK.
GHLALL!
I just need to stop doing, like, everything. No more drugs, no more shoplifting, no more freaking out. I need to clean my life up because right now, everyone thinks I'm awesome but I feel like I suck. And I think they're all lying anyway.
Glaahl.
::pets:: I don't know what's going on, but just keep in mind that taking care of yourself should be priority one, okay? Keep yourself sane and together and healthy and everything else will fall into place. Or, you know, get a little better at least.
::hugs:: I hope things pick up. If you need anything, you know where I am.